Classmates meetup

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Английский

I'm not very sociable, mostly due to lack of time and frequent tiredness. I do not enjoy parties and gatherings, but recently I've realized that a rare visiting of such events lead to secondary problems. Eric Berne gave me a clear understanding that communications between people do not consist only of useful information exchange, but too often are made up of "games", "rituals", "procedures", "stroking" and so on. Berne advises to look at the social interactions from outer, "Martian" point of view, as an exercise that allows to see all their irrationality. The problem, however, is that being a person detached from society, and a highly rational person, I look at the environment like "Martian" too frequently. I cannot understand all those teacup conversations, long purposeless chats, lunch-break discussions, they seem for me just as a waste of time. However, such "games" often continues even in meaningful interactions, so, being unaccustomed to "playing", I'm facing difficulties. Earl Chesterfield wrote that it is a mistake to believe that people are acting according to sober mind, as feelings and emotions are ruling their lives much more often. He also told that a clever person observes and learns the rules of a company or social group, and starts to act only having understood its particularities and regularities. So, it looks like I have to train the ability for non-rational social communications just as I'm learning math, English or logistic regression.

Why am I writing all this? I was invited to meetup of former classmates of the school I was studying from 1st to 9th grade. And yes, I decided to attend.

The meeting was scheduled for 19.00, I've arrived at 19.15 (just not to be the first one), and there were only three persons. One more girl came about half past seven, and till eight the company was very small. Here it is, without me, as I was a photographer:

And here I am:

Someone later said me that I was dressed in the style of Sheldon Cooper from the «The Big Bang Theory». No, I'm not disappointed, in no extend. I tend to believe that for me it's better to be perceived more as a geek, and less like a traditional girl, so this appearance was selected willfully. However, I have my ears not pierced; that was not done intentionally, and I've only accidentally understood that almost all girls wear earrings.

Yeah, girls were in the majority during all the meeting, though later gender imbalance got softened. Either boys work more or they are less punctual

The guy who attended from the beginning, Sasha, is a programmer too. He told that two or three winter months a year he works remotely, from Goa, and showed photos/videos. That was interesting, in my opinion. Ladies looked more like chatterbox and giggles who just wanted to speak, no matter what.

Three girls, I was communicating with more closely during school years, came latter together. So the company has grown in size:

Here they are separately:

I've moved to this part of the table, and the company got a little bit separated, the way it was in school. Another part of the table:

And that's the picture in general:

Well, it seems to me that Sasha was the only boy from the company I've communicated with, and I do not know much about the boys. But I know that half of the girls got divorced, either they have children or not. It seems to me that there are problems in the interaction between genders in this society. Beer and vodka are the most popular drinks here - that's another observation. But personally, I believe that Baileys is better

@темы: Люблю филосовствовать, Визуальное, Вот так живут программисты, english writing skills, Жизненное

Comments

[Iris Lloyd Troy]

Yes, unformal meetings are useful... from time to time))
I have the same problem with ,,rituals,, , ,,games,, and with people talking just to talk, no matter what...
But your evening was pretty good, as i red!
Wish you good luck))

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Iris Lloyd Troy, Yes, it was not bad. I haven't seen some old acquaintances for a long time, and it was useful opportunity to know how they are doing now.