Those wings... I want them too.
АнглийскийOver the last few years I've got accustomed to read technical books constantly. It seems to me that I hardly have held any other literature in my hands since I had finished the university (except for the fanfiction, of course!). And even during student days there were only a couple of fantasy stories that have enthralled me (no, it wasn't Harry Potter). So my acquaintanceship with great minds of liberal arts has finished in the high school classes. Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, Turgenev - I had to read them and I did. And then have forgotten and don't want to return to them now. However, it looks like there is the kind of literature that I undeservedly missed out.
Yeah, there were a lot of books in my parents' house. A lot, lot, lot of them. I've never gone to library to take a book for the school curriculum, as they all stood in the bookcases in our flat. My grandma was fond of collecting masterpieces of classical writings. My mom was fond of collecting books too, but it seemed to me sometimes that she was fond of buying them, without having enough time to read all she had bought. Once I got angry and threw most of the wastepaper from the bookcase in my room into the scrap-heap. Still not sure, should I be ashamed or proud of this action.
Especially my mom liked books on philosophy and psychology, and as I can see now, she had reasons to. Well, let's assume that I'm not mature enough to understand deep thoughts of philosophers, but intercommunication psychology and psychoanalysis are attracting my attention more and more.
You, know, there is a big prejudice against sciences with psy- prefix in our country. It is not surprise, considering how often psychiatry was used for punitive goals in the Soviet Union; it was just dangerous to have any psychological problems. It was dangerous to be displeased with surrounding reality even! As for me, Russian psychology is in some primeval condition now. I see public psychological experts just narrating about their own life experience augmented with superficial knowledge in humanitarian area and passed through their own narrow vision of the world. Sometimes they are retelling books of recognized western researchers - and want Nobel Prize for this achievement. Sometimes they are trying to convince those, whose point of view has fallen out of the conventional - without an evaluation, which is really true. That's not the right ways to solve the conflicts and to treat the depressions, I believe.
Once I've looked through a book in my mom's collection, written by outstanding Russian psychiatrist. That book was mainly composed of letters from his patients, and it was an interesting reading - but only to immerse in someone else's soul, just like Tolstoy and Dostoevsky did. That was the same passive-beholding position, without attempts to dig into the gist of the phenomena, to grasp it, and to fix it.
In contrast, the more I'm getting familiar with foreign literature on psychology, psychoanalysis, psychotherapy, self-management and human resource management, the more I'm getting convinced that they are the real sciences there, abroad. They seems to be based on a huge observation, attentive listening to many stories and pictures of the world, analysis of many situations, systematizing them, building models, proposing hypothesis, conducting experiments, using math statistics... And I like it all.
The first book on interpersonal communication I've encountered was the Dale Carnegie, «How to Win Friends and Influence People». My mom and brother gave it to me when I was a schoolgirl, saying that I'm not capable of interacting with other people in a normal way. (And they were right, and I'm still not capable now). I haven't read this book to the end. You know, school, math, physics, Tolstoy, Dostoevsky... Anyway, I like it, though I'm not sure about its priority in my current to-read list. People occasionally criticize Carnegie, asserting that he taught how to flatter, but I don't think so. It is sensible point that you have to offer something when you want something from the other person, isn't it? A recognition of their merit and importance of their existence, that so many of us lack, for example. Be interested in other's lives, and they will be interested in your problems.
Another good book I have read partly when I was studying in the University is named «Transforming Your Dragons: How to Turn Fear Patterns into Personal Power», by Jose Stevens. Yes, I've found at least one raging dragon in myself, and as it is calm now, I can assume that this reading helped. Also, I liked the concept of seven stages of human maturity. I was almost "adult" then
Hopefully, now I entirely am
The book that I've read recently from start to finish and that greatly influenced my view of the situation around me was Stephen Covey, «The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People». A manager from KL had recommended it to me before I've left the company. Though it is a management and self-management book, it is obviously based on psychotherapists' experiences. For instance, Covey talks about a psychiatrist Viktor Frankl, who survived a Nazi concentration camp, where he understood that there is a freedom in the choice of your reaction to circumstances. Covey also mentions Erich Fromm, who I respect at least for his «The Art of Loving». I've found a passage from this writing here, on diary.ru, got impressed and read it wholly. It is largely philosophical, but the main idea is that we can love different people differently, and that we have to learn how to love them. And I believe that we have to love other people as a matter of principle, just because «valar dohaeris» («all people serve»).
Yes, the George Martin's «A Song of Ice and Fire» is yet another book that I read only in fragments. And yes, I consider this epic fantasy saga as a good psychological work. The inner world of each of its "point-of-view" characters is constructed so plausibly and authentically that you can almost feel yourself in their shoes, look by their eyes and understand their motivation. And the Game of Thrones is just one of the games people play.
«Games People Play» and «What Do You Say After You Say Hello?» by Eric Berne were the books that I took after «The 7 Habits...». The first, containing a catalog of irrational people interactions ("games"), is short and simple, the second is little bit more complicated. The ideas that Eric Berne expounds in the transactional analysis look consistent with people's behavior I see around: that most productive attitude is «I'm OK, others are OK»; that we have not one ego condition, but three of them, The Child, The Parent, The Adult and they differently act in human communications; that a little kid observing the world chooses a scenario to follow it in the rest of his/her life.
Having left the company on the onset of degradation, I came to a conclusion, that the questions of values and corporate culture are indeed important. So the two articles and a video below seems to contain useful information (yes, the «dark triad» exists, corporate values should be taken seriously, and «givers» will save the world!)
Performance and Values
Anatomy of an Asshole
Givers and Takers
What's about now, now I'm reading the «Earl of Chesterfield. Letters to His Son». It's not the psychology in in its pure form, rather epistolary educational prose, but it contains a lot of tricks how to interact with the «higher society». What's about future plan, I'm going to start «The Structures and Dynamics of Organizations and Groups», by aforementioned Eric Berne. Hopefully, it will help me to predict a little bit the changes that will be happening around me.
Yeah, there were a lot of books in my parents' house. A lot, lot, lot of them. I've never gone to library to take a book for the school curriculum, as they all stood in the bookcases in our flat. My grandma was fond of collecting masterpieces of classical writings. My mom was fond of collecting books too, but it seemed to me sometimes that she was fond of buying them, without having enough time to read all she had bought. Once I got angry and threw most of the wastepaper from the bookcase in my room into the scrap-heap. Still not sure, should I be ashamed or proud of this action.
Especially my mom liked books on philosophy and psychology, and as I can see now, she had reasons to. Well, let's assume that I'm not mature enough to understand deep thoughts of philosophers, but intercommunication psychology and psychoanalysis are attracting my attention more and more.
You, know, there is a big prejudice against sciences with psy- prefix in our country. It is not surprise, considering how often psychiatry was used for punitive goals in the Soviet Union; it was just dangerous to have any psychological problems. It was dangerous to be displeased with surrounding reality even! As for me, Russian psychology is in some primeval condition now. I see public psychological experts just narrating about their own life experience augmented with superficial knowledge in humanitarian area and passed through their own narrow vision of the world. Sometimes they are retelling books of recognized western researchers - and want Nobel Prize for this achievement. Sometimes they are trying to convince those, whose point of view has fallen out of the conventional - without an evaluation, which is really true. That's not the right ways to solve the conflicts and to treat the depressions, I believe.
Once I've looked through a book in my mom's collection, written by outstanding Russian psychiatrist. That book was mainly composed of letters from his patients, and it was an interesting reading - but only to immerse in someone else's soul, just like Tolstoy and Dostoevsky did. That was the same passive-beholding position, without attempts to dig into the gist of the phenomena, to grasp it, and to fix it.
In contrast, the more I'm getting familiar with foreign literature on psychology, psychoanalysis, psychotherapy, self-management and human resource management, the more I'm getting convinced that they are the real sciences there, abroad. They seems to be based on a huge observation, attentive listening to many stories and pictures of the world, analysis of many situations, systematizing them, building models, proposing hypothesis, conducting experiments, using math statistics... And I like it all.
The first book on interpersonal communication I've encountered was the Dale Carnegie, «How to Win Friends and Influence People». My mom and brother gave it to me when I was a schoolgirl, saying that I'm not capable of interacting with other people in a normal way. (And they were right, and I'm still not capable now). I haven't read this book to the end. You know, school, math, physics, Tolstoy, Dostoevsky... Anyway, I like it, though I'm not sure about its priority in my current to-read list. People occasionally criticize Carnegie, asserting that he taught how to flatter, but I don't think so. It is sensible point that you have to offer something when you want something from the other person, isn't it? A recognition of their merit and importance of their existence, that so many of us lack, for example. Be interested in other's lives, and they will be interested in your problems.
Another good book I have read partly when I was studying in the University is named «Transforming Your Dragons: How to Turn Fear Patterns into Personal Power», by Jose Stevens. Yes, I've found at least one raging dragon in myself, and as it is calm now, I can assume that this reading helped. Also, I liked the concept of seven stages of human maturity. I was almost "adult" then
Hopefully, now I entirely am The book that I've read recently from start to finish and that greatly influenced my view of the situation around me was Stephen Covey, «The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People». A manager from KL had recommended it to me before I've left the company. Though it is a management and self-management book, it is obviously based on psychotherapists' experiences. For instance, Covey talks about a psychiatrist Viktor Frankl, who survived a Nazi concentration camp, where he understood that there is a freedom in the choice of your reaction to circumstances. Covey also mentions Erich Fromm, who I respect at least for his «The Art of Loving». I've found a passage from this writing here, on diary.ru, got impressed and read it wholly. It is largely philosophical, but the main idea is that we can love different people differently, and that we have to learn how to love them. And I believe that we have to love other people as a matter of principle, just because «valar dohaeris» («all people serve»).
Yes, the George Martin's «A Song of Ice and Fire» is yet another book that I read only in fragments. And yes, I consider this epic fantasy saga as a good psychological work. The inner world of each of its "point-of-view" characters is constructed so plausibly and authentically that you can almost feel yourself in their shoes, look by their eyes and understand their motivation. And the Game of Thrones is just one of the games people play.
«Games People Play» and «What Do You Say After You Say Hello?» by Eric Berne were the books that I took after «The 7 Habits...». The first, containing a catalog of irrational people interactions ("games"), is short and simple, the second is little bit more complicated. The ideas that Eric Berne expounds in the transactional analysis look consistent with people's behavior I see around: that most productive attitude is «I'm OK, others are OK»; that we have not one ego condition, but three of them, The Child, The Parent, The Adult and they differently act in human communications; that a little kid observing the world chooses a scenario to follow it in the rest of his/her life.
Having left the company on the onset of degradation, I came to a conclusion, that the questions of values and corporate culture are indeed important. So the two articles and a video below seems to contain useful information (yes, the «dark triad» exists, corporate values should be taken seriously, and «givers» will save the world!)
Performance and Values
Anatomy of an Asshole
Givers and Takers
What's about now, now I'm reading the «Earl of Chesterfield. Letters to His Son». It's not the psychology in in its pure form, rather epistolary educational prose, but it contains a lot of tricks how to interact with the «higher society». What's about future plan, I'm going to start «The Structures and Dynamics of Organizations and Groups», by aforementioned Eric Berne. Hopefully, it will help me to predict a little bit the changes that will be happening around me.
@темы: english writing skills, Жизненное, Книги
-
-
18.12.2017 в 21:49-
-
18.12.2017 в 21:58Do you have any thematic literature to recommend? On both languages.
-
-
18.12.2017 в 22:31And one of bloggers, Transerfer (she really has nothing in common with transerfing) , recommends good books, sometimes in English.
Here are some books recommended by her and her followers:
Брэнди Энглер "Мужчины на моей кушетке".
О'Коннор "Депрессия отменяется".
книгу Роберта Антона Уилсона "Прометей восставший. Психология эволюции
Книга Восхождение по спирали (о депрессии)
Джедайские техники
But i did not read them yet.
-
-
19.12.2017 в 11:32I like books because they offer system approaches, just the knowledge how does this world function in general. For me it is easier to use that general knowledge to solve your specific problem, rather than search someone with similar case and just "copy&paste". Although... I use both methods when programming, to be honest
-
-
19.12.2017 в 20:32And i remembered one of useful books - useful in communications. М.Литвак, "Психологическое айкидо")))
-
-
19.12.2017 в 21:38I've read "Психологическое айкидо", it is short. The main idea that enriched my knowledge was that a humor is a great weapon. Others his thoughts... I don't know... For me his adoptation of Berne's transactional analysis is full of errors. And I dislike Литвак in general, as I see his point of view being male-centric, often ignoring women interests and even teaching how manipulate them.
-
-
20.12.2017 в 09:59And i remembered good book about dependendence and love - Джеймс Холлис, ,,В поисках Эдема,,.
-
-
20.12.2017 в 10:22